embracin' it

a little late in the day...

story time. 


big head. little body.

that's my baby. 

88 percentile with her head

22 percentile with height.

hopefully this evens out in adulthood.

lovely london.


i am tired.

to write a serious post or not???

warning: this post is only text, so if you like the fluffy stuff. this will be too much for you :)

i feel like i'm a pretty open person. and i'll share my story if it will help someone else. or sometimes it's even good for me to share just as a way of processing through things on my own. 

but there's something about posting it on the internet...

not that i mind sharing with new friends and followers, but ANYONE can read this blog, and for some reason, i get slightly weirded out by that.

never the less, here i go. sharing. 

looking for adoption grants and loans has been really frustrating.

first of all, they aren't in one central place. i have spent hours online researching...

only to find...

we aren't working with a 501c3, so we can't apply for some grants that require you work with a 501c3

we aren't going international so that takes out a lot of grant opportunities

and the hardest catch 22 thing we have to continually deal with is this: 

 once we go active and are placed with a birth mom/baby 
(which practically speaking, when you go active with our agency and are adopting a black baby, you are matched typically in less than 24 hours)

our agency requires the full remaining balance as soon as you're matched,


most grants/loans won't give to you until after you've been matched. 

so...it's a weird and sad place to be.

so, that's where we are at right now in our adoption funding journey. 

i just feel tired.

i feel like i've put so much into all this.

i don't know what to do next...


the mohawk.

happy saturday. 

i wonder how long london will have her mohawk for??



grant update.

last night a got an email from the Gift of Adoption Fund.  
i got so nervous. 

they gift grants monthly. 
they have more than 50 applicants per month
and award about 8 grants in any given month.

the grant manager emailed to say, 

"The Gift of Adoption Fund has tentatively scheduled 
your grant application for review
at the April Grant Selection Committee meeting."

This is such good news that they are going to consider us next month. 

Please please pray for this opportunity. 

We still cannot move forward with adoption unless we get grant monies. 

We long to be matched with a baby and bring our new little one home soon! 


garage sale for our babies

hey friends. 

on april 23rd 

my friend elizabeth and i

are hosting a 
garage sale
in Kansas City

to help bring our babies home!!

(my friend is in the process of adopting from Ethiopia. yeah!)

if you live in Kansas City and want to donate items

please email me asap. 

if you live outside of KC, well...surely you still want to donate and ship items here, right? ;)

thanks for all your help and support!

i only hope our sign will look THIS good. :) 


the waiting game.

so, right now we're waiting on a lot of things...

at least it feels that way.

homestudy sent off.

can't go active yet because we don't have all the funds.

waiting to hear on our grant submissions.
(don't they know we're on the edge of our seats?)

it's hard being patient.

but God's timing is perfect. i must remind myself of this a lot.

happy weekend friends. see you here next week.

thanks for listening.

and just for fun, i came across this picture of my man and i when we FIRST starting dating.

this was actually taken at the K-State Union at their bowling alley.

on a side note: i finally talked landon into smiling with his teeth after we got married :) before then, he thought he looked goofy. i had to prove him otherwise.

so dating= smiles with mouth closed


embracing the love and my crazy hair.

happy thursday. 

cutest cloth diaper booty. 
all taken on the iPhone


happy birthday lon's

happy birthday london!

my sweet little pumpkin noodle (i don't know why i call you that, but i like it)

i don't think you're a follower of my BLOG yet, so i don't know if you'll read this, but maybe someday;)

love you! 

first two images shot by my amazingly talented ashley!

                          shortly after delivery

                   look at those eyes! 

and this week...taken on my iPhone

you are getting so big! !


a labor of love.

london's birth-day is almost here.

i've been thinking about it a lot this week. where i was this time last year...

about to go into a gruesome labor. 

maybe i'll share my birth story some day...
but not today. i don't have the energy. 

i'll give you the cliff notes version.

my attempt at a hippy (natural) birth:

52 hours of labor.

48 hours with NO drugs

OVER 4 hours of pushing.

Emergency C-Section.

There are so many thoughts i have on this experience, but i'll save them for another post.

now that i've scared you from ever having a baby yourself ;)...

i'll leave you with some photos of me and lon's (i'm 8 months pregnant) 

and these are the only pregnant photos you will ever see. 

because i was not a pretty pregnant woman...and I was huge.

but, when one of your besties does a photoshoot with you...
she can make you look pretty good. ;)


embrace the camera

happy thursday. 

here is lon's and i. sweet baby girl turns 1 next week!

these pictures are insane (of me that is) lon's is super cute.

i was trying to get ready (with her awake) and had no make-up and crazy hair.

oh well...these are the pictures we'll look back on and love, right?

all taken on the iPhone

and on a totally different note... please keep the Clouse family from Pennsylvania in your prayers. They lost 7 of their children in a house fire early yesterday. I cannot imagine the grief. I can't get them off my mind today. It breaks my heart.


a cozy newborn.

so, i like to take pictures. 

engaged couples, newborns, etc. 

here are some recent pictures i took of baby sean who was born in january. 

he's gonna be a heart breaker :)



it's almost here.

i am longing for the days of summer. 

sleeveless dresses. 

good coffee. 

and a white haired lady with a bun on the back of her head ;)

thank you hubby's iPhone and shake it app. 

i'll also leave you with a HILLARIOUS video we took of London last week.


the PARTY...part 2

here's the continuation of London's party last week. 

i know you were waiting on the edge of your seat...

the cake is coming! 

 the face she has here is brilliant. like a, what is this mom??

yummy goodness.

baby legs!

   present time

so happy

 she got a tractor! yes, one set of her grandparents are farmers :)

the Porters


i am SO nervous...

Dear Friends and Friends of Friends and Random Blog Readers, 

Your Prayers are needed and wanted.

Deep Breath. 

This morning is a big morning for the Porter home. 

I'm sending off 3 applications for adoption grants/loans.

This process has been WAY harder and emotionally trying than i thought already.

a few grant we thought we were applicable for we aren't. BUMMER.

there are some pretty steep hills to climb with these grants as well. 

so MANY people apply. so many "prefer" international adoption. so many "are less likely" to give you a grant without being placed with a birth mom. 

(sidenote: with our agency, as soon as we're placed with a birth mom/baby our FULL AMOUNT is due within 24 hours. whew! ) 

we still move forward...hoping and praying that through the pages we filled out they can see our hearts and desires and know how much we long for this. 

so, here's to sending them off! ! 
please pray for us. 

pray they would look kindly on our applications.

pray they would give us adoption money, no matter how large or small the amount. 

pray that it could happen soon and we would hear an answer either way.

thanks friends. 

oh, and here are the 3 names, incase you want to pray real specifically 

- the Abba Fund
- the Gift of Adoption Fund
- Lifesong

the Porters
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